4 Keys to Keeping Humility in Sobriety
Author: Justin Mckibben
Humility ain’t easy and just talking about humility and how to be humble is difficult because it doesn’t seem very humble to give advice about being humble or how to stay humble… (one more) Humble…
Ok, but seriously. In recovery humility is important, and finding your humility can feel overwhelming and ambiguous, but in the end it serves an incredibly critical purpose in our lives.
Humility isn’t about thinking less or yourself, it is about thinking of yourself less.
Here are 4 keys to keeping humility in sobriety.
- Think of Others
Understanding that we are not the only important person in the world is essential to the concept of humility. Knowing that others are equally important and that we should do for others what we can and support others when we can is very important to maintaining humility.
Remember, their feelings matter.
No matter who they are, they count. Don’t make everything about you or what is easiest for you. Help another addict or alcoholic when you are hurting, even if you’re new. Just by talking to someone you can shift the focus for both of you.
In addiction we are typically selfish in an above-average way, so in sobriety we should do our best to break the habit.
Thinking of others also constitutes keeping an open mind. By being open minded in our sobriety it allows us to have an elevated awareness, which helps us to better understand each other and support our hopes and dreams despite our differences. Open mindedness can also help us evolve spiritually, and keeps us going with the flow instead of trying to get our way all the time.
- Be Grateful
Spoiler Alert: Gratitude!
Writing a gratitude list may sound a little played out to people in recovery who have probably written many a list before, but they always hold value when you truly take an honest look at the amazing things you have received so far from life, even if it as simple as being grateful to be alive.
Gratitude helps us do more for others because it shows us how much we have been blessed with, and often inspires us to want better for others. When we feel good most of us want others to feel good, and we want them to share in that gratitude.
Look at everything you have, everything you achieve and how you feel… look at every opportunity you have.
Oh yeah, and say thank you… like a lot.
- Let Things Change
Another aspect of gratitude we often overlook, especially when looking at humility, is change. Things change, and we have to accept the change as part of the process. Change can build momentum in recovery, and while many addicts and alcoholics avoid change because it can sometimes create fear, it can be so much more.
Change could be so much more than we can see at face value. All change is actually an opportunity to grow and find new ways to give and receive love.
Remember, you are not in control for a reason! Remember to be grateful, and understand this change is being done FOR you, not TO you.
In recovery from drugs and alcohol it is important to have a healthy concept of self-esteem, acceptance and love.
This means also accepting your limitations. Grow a strong and consistent relationship with yourself, and with those closest to you. Sobriety has a knack for making us hypersensitive sometimes, or we are overly self-conscious. Love your journey for what it is, and respect yourself so you may best respect others.
People get confused and think humility means you can’t have confidence. This is the furthest from the truth. Living in a state of self-love and empowerment is an inspiring and strong place to be because it allows use more healthy space for loving and accepting others.
Know you are awesome.
Also try to accept your boundaries, and remember not to over-due it with the confidence. Understand that while you are powerful, you should still respect and embrace the power of others around you.
Humility is an important piece of sobriety, and in sobriety when we learn how to carry that humility into every aspect of our lives, we improve the quality of life for ourselves and everyone around us.
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